Are there topics that can’t be discussed in your relationship, like sex, money or the dishes? Maybe you get caught in the same fight over and over. Or it feels like you hit a wall around certain subjects.
As the prolific couples therapist Dr. Sue Johnson puts it, the basic problem in most relationship trouble can be traced back to the “protests over emotional disconnection.”
What does that mean?
You may be complaining that your partner never helps you with the dishes, however on a deeper level you may be really saying “You’re not there for me” or “Can I rely on you?”
Stop the Fight
Together we’ll work to stop the fighting and increase your understanding of one another's wants and needs. Through coming to understand the patterns in your relationship, you’ll have the insight and power to make meaningful changes.
Maybe it’s challenging for you to articulate your feelings to your partner. By slowing things down and calming the temperature, we’ll work to create space for you to express your needs and have them met.
End the Nagging and Criticism
It can be extremely painful when your needs are not met by your partner. This can bring about nagging and criticism that will push your partner further away and make the likelihood of you getting your needs met even slimmer. Your concerns are valid, but you can learn to express them in a more productive manner.
Your relationship can improve. By learning new ways to communicate and meet each other's needs you can have the relationship you want. Many relationships go through tough patches. Through working together, developing a deeper understanding of your partner and learning new ways to talk about tough topics your relationship can be stronger and more intimate than before.