Therapy for Men
Seeking out therapy as a man in our culture takes guts and courage. Though things are changing slowly, many of us were raised to believe that "boys don't cry" and showing emotion means you're weak.
Healthy Male Role Models
If you didn't grow up in a household where boys and men were encouraged to have and express emotions, then you're starting out behind the curve. Think about it this way, if no one taught you how to read, perhaps you picked it up on your own, perhaps you didn't.
It's the same with emotions. If you didn't have someone teach you what it means to be sad, angry, happy, excited...how do you expect to know how to handle big feelings in a productive way as an adult? Many men end up ignoring or using emotions in a destructive way. It doesn't have to be that way.
What's A Feeling?
For many men I work with there are two acceptable feelings: fine and angry. What happens if you're not feeling fine or angry? What if you're sad or experiencing grief? Feelings are nothing more than data points that help us make sense of the world. When we can have more access to the full range of our emotional experience, the possibilities are endless!
My Partner Says I'm Emotionally Distant
Many of us happen into therapy because someone recommends we try it. That's ok. It doesn't matter how you take the first step. As long as you're motivated and curious, you can make progress better understanding yourself.
If your partner is telling you that you're emotionally distant, you better pay attention. A long-term pattern of emotional distance can undermine the foundation of any relationship. This could be the wake up call you need.
I Drink/Smoke/Work Too Much
When we're not able to have and express our feelings, many of us look for ways to escape. That can look like drinking/smoking or working too much. While these may seem like effective short-term solutions, they don't usually work out so well in the long-run. By escaping, we create distance and that can end up starting very destructive patterns in our relationships.
What Type of Issues Can Counseling For Men Help With?
Therapy can help with a variety of issues. Here is a short list of some common concerns that will bring people into counseling.
- Relationship Stress
- LGBTQ+ Concerns
- Substance Misuse
- Anger Management
- Sexual Performance Issues
- Work/life Balance
- Body-Image Issues
- Negative Effects of a Tough Childhood
- Out-of-Control Sexual Behavior
- Sexual abuse
What Can I Expect From You As The Therapist?
First off, you're not going to find any toxic masculinity here. I've done and continue to do a lot of my own work around being more present and connected to my own feelings. I'm going to encourage you to be vulnerable with me. To take emotional risks. If you're rolling your eyes as you're reading this, I'm probably not the right fit for you. I welcome and love working with all different kinds of men: straight, gay, bi, trans. If you're not male identified and what I'm describing sounds like what you're looking for, I'd love to work with you, too.
Ok, I'm Curious About Counseling...What's The Next Step?
The process of therapy is just that, a process. If you're curious about what it would be like to start counseling, reach out and let's set up a free, confidential video consultation. Then I will answer your questions and tell you more about what it would be like to work together.
Ready to Take the First Step?
Schedule a free 15 minute video consultation to learn more about starting counseling.