Therapy for Gay Men in San Francisco
Being gay is awesome. It's also probably not the only thing about you that's important.
Why work with a gay therapist?
You want your therapist to get you. You don't want to have to describe the difference between Grindr and Scruff.
It's hard enough dealing with depression, anxiety or relationship stress without the added fear of being misunderstood.
Granted, just because we share a sexual orientation doesn't mean I'll understand everything about you. However, hopefully you'll feel comfortable being yourself and bringing up tough topics.
From my office in Hayes Valley, San Francisco, you'll experience someone who is curious to know more about you and what your experience has been like.
Being open and authentic
Often people will come in and say that they weren't fully open with previous therapists. The didn't feel like they could share about their substance use, sex life or something else related to their sexuality.
Let's change that.
A different kind of "coming out"
Coming out is a rite of passage that all LGBTQ people go through. Some people have easy experiences and for others it can be a real challenge. There's a second coming out that counseling and therapy can help with.
In learning to hide our sexuality, we also learn to hide other important parts of ourselves. Some of us become people pleasers. Others become super focused on work and career.
In "coming out" a second time you can figure out more clearly what changes you want to make in your life to be more authentic and satisfied.
I'm more than just my sexuality
Of course you are. However, there are some issues and concerns that are unique to our community.
Issues that come up for gay men in therapy
- Body image concerns
- Coming out
- Gay parenting
- Long-term effects of surviving the HIV/AIDS crisis (whether positive or negative)
- Masculinity issues
- Monogamous relationship support
- Non-monogamous relationship support
- Out of control sexual behavior
- Overcoming self-criticism
- Processing internalized homophobia
- Undesired use of alcohol and/or drugs
- Unprocessed or unresolved trauma
I want to start therapy but I still have some questions and concerns…
I’m worried I won’t have enough to talk about.
Don’t worry, I have plenty of questions to ask and it’s also ok if there are some moments of silence. As you get more comfortable with the process and with me, words will come more easily. You don’t have to be “good” at therapy and we will check in on the progress as we go.
I don’t want to be in therapy forever.
Therapy doesn’t have to last forever. My job is to help you achieve your goals and make the changes you want to make. For some people that will happen in 3-6 months for others it may take a year or more. It really depends on you and your goals. We will check in on this as we go and you are always welcome to ask questions along the way.
It’s hard to talk about my past.
I get it. There’s some stuff that we’d all like to forget. If it’s important to talk about the past, we’ll get there. While talking about trauma can be painful, it can also be freeing. There are tools and techniques I have studied that can help with that process, like EMDR and mindfulness.
I’m ready to take the next step and start therapy.
Together we can make a plan so that you can achieve your goals and live the more authentic, meaningful life you desire.
Ready to take the next step?
Schedule a free 15 minute phone consultation.
More resources for gay men
1 minute daily self-care ritual for gay men
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